Remain Calm
Thursday, November 30, 2006
I am hyped up on coffee and sugar. Sugar, especially, from
ensaimada and cookies and
dulce-fied bananas and a large piece of rock-hard Milo. And I hyped myself up for no good reason, considering that I have too too too too too too much time on my hands thanks to Reming, Boniface and professors who will only pile the work on when it is storm-less, dead hero day-less and altogether most inconvenient. I was just sitting on the couch an hour or two earlier, a bit weary after reading this short story about the last two people on earth raiding groceries, when I thought to myself, shit, I wants me some sugarrrrrr. I wanted to pretend like everyone else had died from some quick, ruthless disease and I had to raid the nearest Mini-Stop for edible energy. So I proceeded to take the sweet stuff in while watching Rachael Ray brag about making the first meals
with garnish huwaw! to be freeze-dried for space, and now, now,
NOW, I feel restless and wrong.
I love storms. And I love getting stranded. But not in my own house with only my grandparents (I love them, but they are much too turtle-like) for company, not at a time when everyone else I know is bogged down with their own business and not with the type of storm that threatens to remind me once again that my life is defined by electricity. Thus, I have already set away a few books to read, have rationed my cigarettes, will charge my iPod and cellphone to the hilt and will think up of more precautionary measures to accomplish for a weekend that will most probably remain cruel despite precautionary measures.
The story I read before the apocalypse story was this almost-
Redbook-like one about a woman fucking a soap star, and she was wondering why there wasn’t an exact word for the opposite of lonely. And then I remembered this episode in one of the better seasons of
Six Feet Under where Brenda griped about how there wasn’t an exact word for parents whose children have died on them. I am now supposed to write some melancholy answer down for these musings, something that I can force to associate with my current feeling of restlessness and wrongness, but I’m just too lazy.
I am sugar-buzzed, free for days
and lazy. It’s the worst combination. And it’s only Thursday. I could have gone out today, could have done some actual stocking up for the apocalypse roiling in my head, but I just couldn’t bring myself to for some reason. The said laziness, most probably. And I usually like doing things for no good reason. Apparently, the best I can do at the moment is ingest sugar I can’t burn right, and that’s just sad.
posted by marguerite @ 6:38 PM
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